Global warming good news: It might help you lose weight!

Aside from catastrophic storms, flooding, rising sea levels and polar vortexes (or “vortices” if you’re fancy), there may actually be some real benefits to come from global warming.

The Los Angeles Times has reported that climate change threatens to undermine not only how much food can be grown but also the quality of that food as altered weather patterns lead to a less desirable harvest, according to a new study. As a result, crops grown by many of the nation’s farmers have a lower nutritional content than they once did, according to the report by the Chicago Council on Global Affairs.

So I’m thinking that maybe if foods have a lower nutritional content it might also mean less calories which means, maybe just maybe, less fattening. And if that’s the case, climate change might be just the thing we need to fight obesity here in the United States and other tubby Western countries. Why, Michelle Obama should be over the moon!

And speaking of Michelle Obama, with all the excitement about her hashtag campaign to recover the girls kidnapped by the Islamist terror group Boko Haram, you might have missed the fact that global warming might actually be to blame for that as well.

“Instability in Nigeria has been growing steadily over the last decade – and one reason is climate change,” according to the UK Guardian. The paper says a recent study by the Congressionally-funded US Institute for Peace confirmed a “basic causal mechanism” that “links climate change with violence in Nigeria.” In 2009, a UK Department for International Development (Dfid) study warned that climate change could contribute to increasing resource shortages in the country due to land scarcity from desertification, water shortages, and mounting crop failures.

So there you have it. Boko Haram’s kidnapping of 200 girls and massacre of as many as 300 civilians in a single town has nothing to do with militant jihadists wishing to enforce their brand of Islamic fanaticism on innocents and non-believers. They’re just hot, thirsty and hungry.

But what I’d like to know is, if humans are so good at affecting climate change, why can’t we actually control where it occurs? For example, we could do our best to halt warming in places like Nigeria, where it can ultimately cause Islamist terrorists to kidnap schoolgirls, but speed up global warming in the United States to help people lose weight and take the pressure off Florida and Arizona as retirement communities. Just an idea…

6 COMMENTS

  1. The issue is not “global warming”. The
    issue is the CAUSE of global warming. The flawed argument isn’t necessarily
    that there’s such a thing a “global warming” or that it may be happening now.
    The flawed argument is, “We have a global warming problem and, therefore,
    government must do whatever it has to do [more interference with individuals’
    freedoms] to stop it.” It’s a flawed argument because it contains an unproven
    and flawed “stealth” presumption that man must be the cause of global warming.

    The Global Warming proponents want the debate kept at whether there’s global
    warming. Those with at least half a brain need to turn the debate away from that
    somewhat silly argument. The argument about scientific data and evidence of
    whether or not “global warming” exists can go on from now ’till
    Moses. (The Bible does indicate a warm-up and a rising sea in the last days.)
    It is really beside the point. The more the right-thinkers argue this wrong point,
    the sillier they potentially look and the stronger this oft-unspoken
    presumption of man-made causes seems to get.

    Instead, right-thinking people need to
    steer the debate to where the real point is: THE CAUSE. As there may be some
    debate about whether there’s global warming, there’s no real true, scientific
    debate that “man is causing global warming”. Arguments need to be advanced to
    first get this somewhat stealth presumption “out” into the open and
    then to defeat this Collectivist excuse for more government tyranny over our
    lives. It should be fairly easy to win the debate over this really silly
    presumed notion.

  2. The con…from… the great musical “Music Man”…Trouble…Begins with T …which rhymes with P…which stands for POOL — Right here in River City!””” (This was the line used to sell the township on the evils of the local pool hall on its young…so the con artist could collect their $$$ for a music band…but then disappear).

  3. Introduction to . . food prices rising trough the roof? food confiscations ? raids ? so he can send it to all those bodies of his who either grow poppies or cause murder and mayhem the world over instead of growing their own food and building up their countries

  4. You are soooooooooo funny West. You are got Mrs. Obama. You are also showing the republican party really don’t care that much for America fat lazy children. I guess high cholesterol and high blood pressure which cause heart disease is hilarious too you. I wonder what HS football couch Allen West would say about that?

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